In any group, especially one built on faith and fellowship, certain qualities set the foundation for meaningful connection and growth. These principles help us build a group where everyone feels supported while keeping Christ at the center.
Below are my personal top-six qualities of an excellent group. Except for #1, which in my opinion is a must-have, these are not necessarily in order of importance. But just like debates around the CFP playoff rankings, I’m anticipating diverse opinions (which is great).
Before we get into those key elements, our scripture for today is from Hebrews 10:24–25:
“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
This passage emphasizes the importance of coming together in community, encouraging growth in love and good works, and remaining consistent in meeting and supporting one another.
Here’s my personal list:
1. Christ-Centered and Scripturally Based
At the core of everything we do is Jesus, and our conversations and actions should always point back to Him. Grounding our discussions in Scripture keeps us rooted in truth and aligned with God’s will.
2. A Safe Place to Be Real
Life is full of challenges, and a group should be a place where people feel comfortable sharing without fear of judgment. Authenticity builds trust, and trust opens the door to genuine connection.
3. Encouraging Growth, Not Perfection
No one has it all together, and that’s okay. A great group focuses on helping each other grow closer to God, not achieving some unrealistic ideal. Growth is about taking small, meaningful steps forward in faith.
4. A Balance of Listening and Sharing
Healthy groups create room for every voice to be heard. Some members may need to open up more, while others may need to step back and listen. A balance ensures everyone feels included and valued.
5. Relatable
Faith isn’t meant to stay in a Sunday morning ‘box’—it’s for our everyday lives. A good group keeps things practical and accessible, connecting faith to real-world challenges and experiences.
6. Welcoming and Inclusive
Whether someone is new to faith or a long-time believer, they should feel like they belong. A welcoming group goes beyond polite hellos to truly embraces each member’s unique story and journey.
Honorable Mentions:
- Consistent and Dependable
- Prayerful
- Accountable
- Service-Oriented
- Joyful and Fun
- Relationship-Focused
Questions
- Which one or more items above resonate most with you as critically important and non-negotiable?
- Do the items above match your personal list? If not, what adjustments would you suggest?
- What do you like most about the group, and why do you keep coming back?
- Do you agree that being ‘Christ-Centered and Scripturally Based’ is a non-negotiable? Or could we get the same value out of having a non-Christian ‘support group’?
- To me, being ‘relatable’ is like adding a secret ingredient that makes a recipe stand out above others. Most Christian groups understand the basic ‘ingredients,’ but emphasizing relatability takes the quality of the group to the next level. Agree or disagree?
Men's Small Group Blog 